Dad in the Box

  • Pokémon Politics Go!

    By John Christmann
    July 21, 2016

    As a rule I stay away from popular fads.  Politics included.

     

    I find my views on the latest crazy trends that are sweeping the nation are usually wrong and completely out of touch ...

  • For Your Eyes Only

    Given all the controversy surrounding private email servers circulating the political landscape lately, I have been thinking a lot about email confidentiality.

    I would share my thoughts with you, ...

  • A Bad Hair Day

    I used to think there was nothing more pathetic than a wet cat.

    I was wrong.

    A shaved cat is far more distressing.

    I have seen wet dogs and short-haired dogs and coiffed dogs before.

  • Prelude To A Kiss

    A man kissed me while I was at a bar refilling my wife’s champagne glass.

    It is, after all, wedding season.

    But wait.  Let me back up.  

    Starting with the Trump rally in San ...

  • A Winning Note

    Winning isn't everything, but it beats anything in second place. - William C. Bryant

    At 0:00 seconds, when the whistle finally blew, bedlam on an ordinary school lacrosse field in New Jersey ...

  • Driving Aloud

    My sixteen-year-old twins are worried that I am going to yell at them in the car.

    Given that they are both new drivers with learner's permits, this a probably a reasonable assumption.

    But I ...

  • How Ya Doin?

    On a day-to-day basis it makes me feel very secure to know that my teenage kids are emotionally healthy and coping comfortably well with school and life and social interactions at such an ...

  • Follicle Follies

    I came back from vacation to some life changing news.

    It seems that while I was away dedicated scientists working overtime on a very important genetic study revealed the “root” cause ...

  • Hitting The Sauce

    Let me just start off by saying that I do not like to cook.

    I suppose I could add a snarky rejoinder such as If you could taste my cooking you would understand why.  But the fact is, despite ...

  • Alone Together

    What if they threw a party and no one came?

    Outside of the obvious feeling of isolation, there is something kind of appealing at the thought of being the only one present at what should otherwise ...

  • Easy Come, Easy Go

    It may come as a bit of a shock, but I did not win the Powerball lottery last week.  Nor did anyone in my family. 

    Nor did you. 

    Just like that our dreams vanished and we were ...

  • The Year In Review

    It’s 2016!

    I realize that this is not much of a revelation.  But it seems like only days ago that I woke up with a hangover and it was 2015.

    In truth, it was more like a week ago and ...

  • The True Test of Giving

    Last week my friend Dana gave a kidney to someone in need.

    They actually refer to the selfless act of sacrificing an organ for the sake of others as a donation.  He correctly donated a ...

  • My Little Runaway

    I always enjoyed watching my daughter play youth soccer when she was little.

    Since I knew little about the game, my appreciation for her play was something that was initially hard to define.

  • Nobody On

    I don’t really care for the teams playing in the World Series this year.

    Opening pitch

    It may have something to do with being a Cubs fan.  

    1st Inning

    Whenever I watch ...

  • Breaking Murphy Bad

    Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. —  Murphy’s Law

    I don’t know who Murphy was, but he sure is blamed for a lot of bad stuff.  

    But sometimes Murphy’s ...

  • Trumping The Pope

    What if . . .

    President Trump: Welcome Your . . . say, how should I address you? Honestly, Your Holiness sounds more like Hillary Clinton’s email server. How about Your Popeliness

    Pope ...

  • A Good Summer Read

    What ever happened to trust?

    When I was in high school teachers trusted tthat we all completed our reading assignments over the summer.  The first day of school we were asked if we read ...

  • All The Right Notes

    I hate my kids.

    Oh, I don’t mean that literally.  I mean I hate them in the sense that I am jealous.  Because at some point during my vain attempts to pass on my own limited skill ...

  • A Clean Start

    I have been in neglect to discuss a very important and meaningful subject that touches all of our lives on a daily basis.

    I am, of course, referring to heavy appliances.

    You know.

  • A Clean Start

    I have been in neglect to discuss a very important and meaningful subject that touches all of our lives on a daily basis.

    I am, of course, referring to heavy appliances.

    You know.

  • Planet Lite

    Honestly, I don’t know why they bother to call Pluto the Dwarf Planet.  Either it is a planet or it isn’t. Calling it a Mini Planet or a Planette or a Junior Birdman Planet is ...

  • My Favorite Child

    I read somewhere that 70% of parents have a favorite child but won’t admit it.   

    This makes me feel awful.  I don’t have a favorite.  Never did.  

    So what ...

  • Call Me Him

    The other morning I learned that Bruce Jenner is now a woman named Caitlyn.

    As far as I know she is the only reality show Olympic decathlon champion to ever grace the cover of a Wheaties Box and ...

  • A Picture of Emotion

    I hate emoji.  

    For those of you who receive unadulterated text messages free from cartoon additives, let me explain.  Emoji are those happy little picture images that are often used to ...

  • A Driver Moment

    Greetings from the car of the future!

    First the good news:  We no longer have to drive!  The cars drive themselves!

    And now the bad news:  We still have to sit in them if we want ...