Sunday, July 29

Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth,

Dad and I made good time driving back home from Camp Goodriddance last night and settled down to a quiet dinner.    We celebrated (your safe arrival at camp) over a bottle of 1905 Bordeaux champagne.

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Despite the fact that you didn’t want to attend sleep away camp I think we made the right decision to send you.  It will be a healthy change for us all.  You can learn some independence and I can enjoy some “me” time while dad works.

Write soon!

Love,

Mom

 

Monday, July 30

Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth,

It’s hard getting used to you not being here.  This morning out of habit I covered the toilet seat with toilet paper before I realized that nobody else had used the toilet.

For breakfast I made dad some pancakes which he would normally enjoy, except that these were shaped like unicorns and had chocolate chips in them.  He said thanks anyway but he’d buy a bran muffin at work.

I got all my errands done by 9:00 a.m. so I watched a few movies.  Then I sat on the front porch and waited for dad to come home.  Between two and seven o’clock fifty-two vehicles passed our house!  Twenty were trucks, eighteen were SUV’s, twelve were sedans, and two were tricycles.

Please write soon!

Love,

Mom

 

Tuesday, July 31

Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth,

I invited some friends over for lunch today but they’re all busy with their kids.  I can relate because I’m even busy without my kids!

I organized your closets today and got rid of all your junk.  Oh, and I have a surprise for you when you get home—I cut out all those annoying tags from your clothes and sewed in name labels!  Remember the time Elizabeth left her underwear at the water park and we weren’t sure which ones at the lost and found were hers? (I still think we guessed right).  That won’t happen again!

Believe it or not I’ve been cooking from scratch and even used the recipe book you made me for Mother’s Day.   The peanut butter and pickle casserole was great, except for when I choked.   Good thing I had the grape Kool-Aid and cheddar cheese spray smoothie to wash it down!

Haven’t heard from you yet.  Please write soon!

Love,

Mom

 

Wednesday, August 1

Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth,

I read War and Peace today.  Twice.

I keep thinking I hear your voices in the background telling each other, “If you give me another wedgie I’ll rip your head off!”  I guess it’s just my imagination.

Henry, remember that PlayStation game, Death Junkie, you asked me over and over to play with you and I always refused because it was too violent?  Well, guess what?  Not only have I been playing it, I’ve mastered the art of the gladiator!  I slaughtered all my mortal enemies in the arena battles using nothing but severed human arms and legs as weapons!

By the way, Heather, your fish are doing well.  I bought an action treasure chest and plant combo and installed a hatchery for breeding to keep them happy and entertained.  I’ve been feeding them three meals a day plus snacks.  They’re getting big!

 

Thursday, August 2

Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth,

I’ve taken up a new hobby—Civil War reenactment.

Still haven’t heard from you.   Please! Write!  Soon!

P.S.  I can’t wait until you come home.  Only five and a half more weeks!

Love,

Mom

 

When Jersey Girl Lisa Tognola traded her job as freelance writer for that of full-time mother of three children, it didn’t take long before her writing was reduced to grocery lists, notes to school nurses excusing her kids from gym class, and e-mails to her husband reminding him to call his mother.  Daily life as a suburban mom was fraught with challenges and unexpected dangers like adult dinner groups, town hall meetings and home shopping parties.  Rather than fight her fate, this mom embraced it by unleashing her inner columnist.  Her weekly column, Main Street Musings, reflects on life in the suburbs---the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Visit her blog http://mainstreetmusingsblog.com/.  Follow her on twitter @lisatognola