Last time, we discussed the kinds of questions you need to ask in order to be sure that you and the person you are dating/in a romantic relationship with or married to is on the same page about what you want from life, and how you see yourselves growing together.
Sometimes the answers will be perfect. At other times, you may not like what you hear. In this case, you will have to decide whether to continue, or let the relationship go.
This may sound harsh, but the truth is that we all deserve to have a happy life with meaning and fulfillment. There will be negative people who will hold you back if you let them. You need to seek out positive supportive people and surround yourself with them, especially if you are undergoing any big changes in your life.
Getting the Help You Need
For example, imagine you want to go back to college to finish your degree. Your spouse is going to have to look after the kids a few times a week while you go to night classes. Yes, it might mean sacrifice for a couple of years until you complete your BA, but once you do, you can earn more, getting a better job, or start a whole new career.
If they are resentful, though, that is going to make your job that much tougher. In that case, you have other options. You might ask the neighbors, or parents of the kids' school friends, to help out with playdates or sleepovers so your partner does not feel too burdened. But if they are not willing to, or can’t help because they are stretched to the limit, ask friends and family, hire a sitter, and so on.
At college, surround yourself with positive people who take the work seriously. Buddy up with people so that if you do miss class because you are out sick or have other commitments, you can get the notes and other important information from them, such as term paper topics, test dates and so on.
Make time for coffee if you can to chat about the classes and enjoy a positive, stimulating atmosphere. Try to join in with campus events, use the library, and make the most of the resources available to you. Professors or their teaching assistants might have drop-in sessions, or there might be one-to-one assistance with essay writing through the English department.
Decide what direction you want to go in life, and chances are you will meet positive, supportive people along the way.
We hope you’ve learned a lot from this series and become inspired enough to take the first steps in a new direction with the courage and conviction you need to succeed.
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