Author’s Note: Mom + Pop Culture are a couple of real characters. They could be you and me. Or not. Every so often, I eavesdrop on their conversations. Let’s listen in on what they’re saying right now about a new dining spot in town.
POP CULTURE: So, Mom, which Happy Hour spot shall we grace with our presence this evening?
MOM CULTURE: How about the bank, Pop?
POP: How about it?
MOM: I’d like to try it.
POP: Are you hearing OK, Mom? I said Happy Hour.
MOM: I heard that, Pop. Haven’t you heard?
POP: School me.
MOM: Well, you know how some people were upset about that new bank opening in town?
POP: Sure. It’s about time we woke up to the harsh reality that even one bank too many threatens our way of life… not unlike nuclear energy.
MOM: Don’t get me started on that one. You know what the school superintendent told us this morning at the Chamber of Commerce breakfast?
POP: I have no clue.
MOM: I’ve known that for 30 years, but anyhoo, he said the nuclear plant closing will mean the school district in the next several years stands to suffer a $60 million shortfall in revenues that the energy company contributes to the community.
POP: How do they propose to get back that money?
MOM: Better sit for this one: School taxes would have to increase by 13 percent a year for four years. And the district couldn’t afford to sustain some of the advanced academic programs that are popular with students.
POP: Well, the plant had to go. Somebody will figure something out, I’m sure. It’s all good. In the meantime, thanks to that taxing conversation, I need Happy Hour more now than I did three minutes ago. What were you babbling about the bank?
MOM: I was saying that the bank deserves credit.
POP: Did it turn itself down for a loan?
MOM: Cute, Pop. My point is that despite folks questioning the need for another bank, it has responded with ingenuity to the protests and the picket lines blocking ATM machines.
POP: Alright. You’ve piqued my interest. What’s going on there?
MOM: This is so cool: It has opened a casual dining area called Food Bank.
POP: Hmm. Not sure how tasteful that is.
MOM: Oh, I hear the food is edible enough. No mercury deposits in the ahi tuna or anything like that. And the drinks are drinkable. Mary and Mike checked it out and gave it thumbs up. They said they walked out of there with a little bounce in their step.
POP: Well, the bank certainly is putting their money where our mouth is, but I meant the lounge’s name might be considered in dubious taste. A food bank is a social service that caters to the needy.
MOM: So does this Food Bank. It’s a new social gathering place that caters to people who need to blow off steam after work on a Friday night. What’s wrong with that?
POP: I suppose it’s a clever way to have the protesters withdraw their pickets.
MOM: And just in time, I might add.
POP: Why. What possibly could have happened?
MOM: Well, Pop, I have it on good authority that the more radical bank rebels were preparing to go to the mattresses.
Bruce Apar is chief content officer of Pinpoint Marketing & Design, a Google Partner Agency. Its Adventix division helps performing arts venues increase ticket sales. He also is an actor, a community volunteer, and a contributor to several periodicals, including Westchester Magazine. Follow him as Bruce the Blog on social media. Reach him at email@example.com or 914-275-6887.