Jaffe Morning Briefing - February 21, 2017



SEASIDE HEIGHTS - Just when you thought it was safe to go in the water, another TV reality show will soon smash into this summer resort, still bruised from years of MTV's "Jersey Shore." This new one is about a bunch of roommates with boardwalk day-jobs who work together at a Boulevard nightclub after dark. Producers held a casting call for loud, fun, and footloose singles at The Bamboo Bar on Saturday. Owner John Saddy tells the Asbury Park Press this is unlikely to be another wild, crazy or tawdry Snooki-fest because it revolves around young working stiffs. Not for long. If viewers wanted to see boring people, they would just tune in to a mirror. 

HOPEWELL - Red-faced township school officials are offering apologies over the bonehead move to serve fried chicken to celebrate Black History Month. Apparently, students were able to appreciate the African-American struggle on February 16, as they hunkered down to a soul food meal, including corn bread, sweet potato casserole and all the fixings at Hopewell Valley Central High School, NJ.com reports. Next up, with St. Patrick's Day arriving and more stereotypes to propagate, perhaps students will be able to enjoy a six-course meal of five potatoes and a Guinness.

Sign Up for E-News

TRENTON - The Guadagnos will soon be a one-income household. Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno's husband thinks it's damn time she got a promotion after dealing with this so-and-so boss for seven years. In an official retirement letter to the Secretary of State, who also happens to be his wife, Appellate Court Judge Michael Guadagno writes, "With your term ending ... and my income substantially reduced, this may be an excellent opportunity for you to consider a career change to a more lucrative position." Hmmm.

ENGLEWOOD - Perhaps she thought it was her inheritance? Whatever her reasons, a 59-year-old city woman will spend six months in the Bergen County jail for collecting her dead mother's Social Security payments, totaling $128,000, for nearly eight years. The money kept getting direct-deposited into mom's bank account, which she happily siphoned until the feds caught on in 2014. She also pleaded guilty to fraudulently collecting her mother's New York State pension benefits. Once released, she must repay every cent and be on probation for five years. And, ultimately, she also has to answer to the ghost of mom.  

WASHINGTON TOWNSHIP - These things happen. After all, an 88-year-old driver shouldn't be required to keep the car on the road at all times, right? So, what is the big deal if she plowed through the front of her neighbor's house yesterday, trapping the pet dog that had been enjoying a relaxing afternoon in the living room. No big injuries, NBC News reports, although the house is trashed and could be condemned. Again, no big deal. Nothing some home-baked cookies and a freshly knit afghan can't fix.


FAIRLAWN - While the President despises 99 percent of the working media, decreed as corrupt, dumb losers, there is one station he can stand, for the moment: UNF News. It is owned by a 19-year-old Fair Lawn teen, who started the organization when he was 8. It has no subscribers or advertisers. But it somehow had credentials and access to the White House press conference last week. And that allowed its founder, publisher, editor and reporter, Kyle Mazza, to pose this question to the leader of the free world: "Melania Trump announced the reopening of the White House Visitors Office. And she does a lot of great work for the country as well. Can you tell us a little bit about what first lady Melania Trump does for the country?" 

Trump's response? 

"Now, that's what I call a nice question," he said. "That is very - who are you with?" 

The answer - UNF News. 

"Good," the president said. "I'm going to start watching, all right?"


NORWALK, Ohio - Fantastic news for Elizabeth "Liz" Smith: She is dead. That's right, Liz is happy to no longer be among us, reports the Sandusky Register. Sure, the 87-year-old retired switchboard operator, who volunteered 45 years with the Girl Scouts, loved life. But, it was time to go, reported her obituary. "Liz is smiling now, not to be living during the Trump Presidency," it stated. Smith's daughter offered clarity at this somber moment: "She doesn't like the man, she never has, thought he was a pompous ass." 


It was this day in 2011 that an NYU professor had an experimental life-blogging camera removed from his head after his immune system rejected the implant. Next time: Duct tape.


Protean [PROH-tee-un] - adjective 

Definition: Displaying great diversity or variety  

Example: I take a protean approach to my breakfast, often mixing my Cap'n Crunch and Lucky Charms. 



Editor's Note:  Jaffe Communications is the franchisee/publisher of TAPinto New Brunswick.

The opinions expressed herein are the writer's alone, and do not reflect the opinions of TAPinto.net or anyone who works for TAPinto.net. TAPinto.net is not responsible for the accuracy of any of the information supplied by the writer.

TAP Into Another Town's News:

You May Also Be Interested In

Sign Up for E-News

New Brunswick

The Jaffe Briefing - May 21, 2018

The Jaffe Briefing will not publish from Thursday through Monday. A great Memorial Day to all!

STATEWIDE - Should public school students be allowed to attend schools in other towns? That's the big, controversial question in a lawsuit filed against the state that looks to end what some consider to be the worst school segregation in the nation. The ...

The Jaffe Briefing - May 18, 2018


IN COURT - Sounds like a cheesy thing to do, but the NJ Turnpike Authority has gone to court for years trying to stop a pizzeria chain whose logo is suspiciously similar to our beloved Garden State Parkway sign. Sure, nobody wants drivers searching for an on-ramp to end ...

The Jaffe Briefing - May 17, 2018


MOUNTAINSIDE - Oh, where to begin describing this 46-page lawsuit against two Mountainside cops? A detective sergeant placing his testicles on co-workers' food. And throwing poop-smeared toilet tissue at them. And defecating in someone's boots. And taunting with a dildo dubbed "Big Blue" he liked to wave in cops' faces, as he chased ...

The Jaffe Briefing - May 16, 2018


ATLANTIC CITY - Happy days are here again, as the state's once gasping gaming resort is expecting sports betting will rake in $150 million to $175 million a year in new, glorious profits - courtesy of your pals on the U.S. Supreme Court. Moreover, ecstatic Stockton University officials believe, this recharged gambling mecca will bring in a whole new ...

The Jaffe Briefing - May 15, 2018


STATEWIDE - This. Changes. Everything. Legal sports betting is finally taking its rightful place in New Jersey, with the U.S. Supreme Court throwing out this dumb federal ban that has lasted for more than 25 years and has cost New Jersey billions of dollars in wasted opportunity. Places like the Atlantic City casinos and the racetracks will suddenly ...

The Jaffe Briefing - May 14, 2018


TRENTON - If you are a 16-year-old kid, absolutely convinced you have the maturity to make a life-long commitment, now's the time to get married. That's because state officials are poised to ban child marriage, ending the horrid practice of children as young as 16 getting hitched. NJ 101.5 reports there have been 200 such marriages ...

Rutgers Athletics Signs Dyehard Fan Supply to New Multi-Year Agreement

May 21, 2018

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ -  Rutgers Athletics has selected Dyehard Fan Supply, an event and retail merchandise marketing and e-commerce company, as the official merchandising partner for the Scarlet Knights in a new multi-year agreement.Dyehard will handle game day and event merchandising for Rutgers Athletics.

“We’re excited to expand gameday merchandising options and elevate ...

Newark man given 22-year sentence for kidnapping, sexual asault of Rutgers student

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ - A Newark man was sentenced Friday to 22 years in prison for the 2016 kidnapping and sexual assault of a Rutgers University student on the school campus in New Brunswick.

Michael Knight, 40, of Newark must serve at least 85 percent of his sentence before he is eligible for parole, Middlesex County Prosecutor Andrew Carey said in a statement today.

Superior Court Judge ...

Rutgers center battles noise pollution nationwide

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ  - Eric Zwerling got a call this week from a man was living next to a fitness center, complaining he repeatedly heard the loud thud heavy free weights and medicine balls hit the floor.

The man was recovering from having a pace maker in his chest and wondering of the impact of the noise from the gym.

“I’ve received thousands of calls,” said Zwerling, ...

Police Investigate Rabbit "Tale"

May 11, 2018

SOUTH PLAINFIELD, NJ – Local cops are investigating an incident of ‘theft by deception’ involving the Plainfield Animal Hospital. 

According to the incident report filed by Officer Justin Melanson and obtained by TAPinto, residents of South Plainfield took their pet rabbit to the Park Avenue animal hospital on April 4 to be euthanized due to advanced ...


Here's How to Help Protect Young Athletes from Injury: Let Them Play Multiple Sports

May 1, 2018

Dear TAPInto New Brunswick:

One of the responsibilities that parents take most seriously is protecting their children from injury, whether it is buckling seat belts in a car or wearing a helmet while riding a bike. And when their kids become teenagers and want to participate in sports or other activities, parents do everything they can to keep their sons and daughters from getting ...

Golf & Canasta/Mah-Jongg/Board Game Classic on May 20th

May 13, 2018

         The Daniel Pearl Education Center (DPEC), an East Brunswick-based charitable organization that sponsors a wide range of community outreach programs, is hosting its fifth annual Golf Classic on Sunday, May 20 at the Cranbury Golf Club.
          In addition to the golf tournament, there will also be an ...