Jaffe Morning Briefing - November 11, 2016



FORT LEE - Some good news, finally, at the George Washington Bridge: In honor of Veterans Day, and saluting the many who have served so unselfishly, the Port Authority will unfurl what is believed to be the world's largest free-flying American flag. It will hang from the upper arch of the bridge's New Jersey tower until 1:15 p.m. The flag, weighing in at an impressive 450 pounds, is a great way to say "Thank You." 

PARAMUS - While all of us puppy lovers had big hopes the owner of a Route 17 pet store was going to get slapped with crippling fines for hundreds of charges of abusing puppies, it looks as if he will be getting away with only $19,000 in restitution. You may recall the national story in April, when police found 67 puppies crying, freezing and locked in small metal cages overnight inside a van behind the pet store. While the restitution seems a wee bit low, the good news is that this guy's business appears ruined. Perhaps his next step is to open a coffee shop, as it is currently legal to lock up your beans in a van overnight, no matter the temperature. 

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TRENTON - It seems more than pointless at this point, but Sen. Loretta Weinberg is still beating the drum on Bridgegate and calling for Gov. Chris Christie to be impeached - even if it occurs after he leaves office. A trial in the state Senate may be fun for Weinberg, but there are about 20 other key priorities that our state leaders need to focus on as the Christie Administration finishes out its days. Let's all focus on the future and hope to no longer see "Time for some traffic problems in Fort Lee" in our daily news coverage. Time to be productive on building tunnels to Manhattan, solving the pension crisis, salvaging Atlantic City, etc.

ATLANTIC CITY - The Press of Atlantic City offered up an interesting perspective of a really awful week for the typical Atlantic City resident. The Local Finance Board decided the city would be taken over by the state, after months of wrangling. And then, the guy whose casinos went bankrupt as he fled with wads of cash was elected President, as the rotting remnants of those bitchin' 1980s parties are a daily reminder for any resident meandering onto the Boardwalk. Read it here. 


TRENCIN, Slovakia - With all the election news in the U.S., most media outlets were too busy to focus on the annual grave-digging competition at the international exhibition of funeral, burial and cremation services yesterday. But not us. We can confirm that two brothers dug a grave 1.5 meters deep, two meters long and 90 centimeters wide in just 54 minutes in the western Slovak town of Trencin, soundly defeating 10 other two-member teams from Slovakia, Poland and Hungary as a very small audience cheered loudly. A five-member jury agreed: the brothers dug the neatest grave.


It was this day in 2014 that the U.S. and China agreed to cut greenhouse gases, with President Obama setting a goal of at least a 26 percent reduction over 2005 levels by 2025. And now?  


Ukase [yoo-KAYSS] - noun 

Definition: Order, command  

Example: America braces for the first ukase from the President-elect. 




Wow, what a week. The Morning Briefing is proud to have 20,000 subscribers in New Jersey, and many were eager to share their opinions with us. Trump supporters are more emboldened than ever; we intentionally left names off their emails. Here's a sampling: 

"So glad Trump won and not that laying (sic) piece of crap Clinton. Trump may not be the all (sic) answer but far better then (sic) the illegal bitch Hillary." 

- Sales guy for large hardwood distributor 

"You did not want the liar, thief and killer in did you" 

- Administrator of an insurance fund 

"Grow up." 

- Executive Director of a non-profit organization serving people with disabilities  

"Slanted, ignorant, left-leaning publications like yours is why Donald Trump won. People are fed up with the current Admin and political hacks like Hillary. Unsubscribe - and good riddens! (sic)" 

- Lobbyist for a major housing builder

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