BARNEGAT - Do Snooki and JWoww make your mouth water for fast food? Burger King seems to be counting on it. The fast food chain is getting cheesier, with the cast of MTV's "Jersey Shore" pitching its new Italian-style Chicken Parmesan sandwich. That's why the cast showed up last week at the West Bay Avenue Burger King, filming what the Southern Ocean Times says is part five-minute infomercial and part teaser for the upcoming "Jersey Shore" reunion episode. Like the new chicken parmesan, it is sure to make you gag.

DOVER - It's July, the perfect time to get out of town. And the perfect time for your local elected leaders to stick around and vote themselves raises when no one is paying attention. The Daily Record was paying attention in Dover, reporting the part-time mayor was given a 60 percent raise, to $49,500, while aldermen gave themselves around a 50 percent raise, to $18,500.  One alderman explained away the generous raise, saying he and his colleagues interrupt their private lives "three or four times a week for people in the town."  Fair enough; but most people serve on local governing bodies for much less, and many do it for free. (See Board of Education.)

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PERTH AMBOY - Motorists stuck in all that Sunday night traffic on the Turnpike are still steamed, but at least there's the promise of relief this coming weekend. The cause of the traffic was the dumb closure of the Bayonne Bridge, forcing cars to drive though local neighborhoods to get to the Outerbridge Crossing in Perth Amboy. Mayor Wilda Diaz joined a chorus of screaming locals, complaining how their streets became huge parking lots. The Port Authority has relented, CBS reports, saying it will open the bridge Sunday afternoons and urged motorists to stay off local streets when there is heavy traffic. Yeah, right.

PISCATAWAY - One of Central Jersey's last, large industrial tracts just sold for $57 million, promising a major economic boost for this sprawling Middlesex County town. The Manhattan-based Rockefeller Group plans to invest up to $250 million to redevelop its newly acquired 228-acre River Road property. Before summer's end, executives tell the Wall Street Journal, the firm will break ground on a 2.2-million-square-foot logistics center to cash in on the e-commerce boom, and perhaps offer more far-off parking for Rutgers football tailgates.​​​​​​​

ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL - The Observer is telling the story of a former tennis pro who is now making an independent bid for governor. Gina Genovese, who has been pushing, prodding and pestering government leaders to promote municipal consolidation, is running on a platform focusing on more shared services, hoping it could slash property taxes by 15 percent for many weary taxpayers. Scrappy independents like Genovese should be warmly welcomed, as they often force leading candidates to address sticky topics that may not be in the playbook. 


LONDON - It didn't take long for the eye doctor to figure what was ailing a 67-year-old woman, complaining of dry eyes. The plan was to do cataract surgery, but then a discovery was made: 27 mashed up contact lenses in her right eye, fused together with mucus and creating a "large mass." These monthly disposable contacts were generated over 35 years; it was an impressive collection because of the patient's deep-set eyes that somehow allowed them to stick around.


You can lose weight for your health. Or, go for the gold, like the people of the United Arab Emirates, who learned on this day in 2013 that the government would pay one gram of gold for every kilogram they lose.



Yawp - [YAWP] - verb

Definition: To make a raucous noise; to squawk or clamor.

Example: I repeatedly yawped while watching the Mets blow another one last night.