Conversations with Joan Herrmann

September 25, 2020

Editor's Note: This is a "best-of Joan" column, which first ran on Oct. 11, 2019. We live in a fast paced world, seldom taking the time to catch our breath. Add to the general stress of life, a significant event such as losing a loved one, getting fired from a job, going through a divorce, or ...

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I am the queen of procrastination, always have been. Throughout school and into my adult life, I always waited until the last minute to get something done, telling myself that I work best under pressure. The reality was, I didn’t feel like doing the work, and so I waited until it was absolutely ...

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A tragedy is defined as “an event causing great suffering, destruction, and distress.” We understand the meaning of those words, however, I believe the important component is how we view the situation. What may be a “tragedy” to one person, is nothing more than a “bump in the road” to ...

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Editor's Note: This originally ran on September 13, 2019. A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. – Elbert Hubbard Q. Let’s talk about friends. When we’re young, we use the word ‘friend’ much like you say it’s used on social media. But what is it really and how do you ...

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Editor's Note: This first ran in August of 2019 when Joan and TAPinto had a different format, the Q&A. Enjoy! Joan: Do you have one person in your life that really irks you? No matter what you say or do, this person has the ability to totally ruin your day, or in some cases, your month, ...

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Over the past few years, anyone who knows me has heard me talk about the book I was going to write. I’ve been writing my book for years, and yet, nothing has come to fruition. Words usually flow out of me like a river, but every time I attempted to write this book, I was dry. Nothing of ...

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Yesterday, as I was driving in my car, my mind started to wander, as it usually does, and I pictured a day in the future when I will be sitting with my grandchild reminiscing about the pandemic of 2020. As I envisioned that encounter, my mind immediately shifted to my grandmother, who for most of ...

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Just about everyone wants to be happy. Aristotle said, “Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.” If happiness is something we strive so hard to attain, and if it is truly the end all and be all of life, then why does it elude so many? There is ...

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I recently learned that my ex husband got engaged. After living for more than three decades with this man in my life, I must admit, hearing this news was a punch in the gut. I spent the next few weeks with a horrible feeling surrounding me, you know that uneasiness you get in your stomach after ...

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Editor's Note: This first ran July 26, 2019, one year ago. It was back when Joan and I were using a conversational format, a Q & A. This seemed like a good time for this type of encouragement, a time to regroup and be positive after the difficult first half of the year we've all had. Most of ...

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Recently a friend who was contemplating separating from her husband gave me a call and asked my advice. A few years ago when my emotions were spinning out of control, and I was in the throes of my marriage breakdown I would have shouted, “Divorce the bastard!” Now, eight years post-divorce, I ...

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This month, July 8 to be exact, marks the 11th anniversary of the premiere of the Change Your Attitude…Change Your Life brand and radio show. Back in 2009, I was going through a bit of an identity crisis trying to figure out my next move. I had given so much of myself to my family that I got ...

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“If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands, if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands, if you’re happy and you know it and you really want to show it if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.” Thinking about this song brings back joyous memories of dancing around my family ...

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This story was recently shared with me. It is a beautiful example of the power of positive reinforcement. One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the class. She told them to think of the nicest things they could say about each of their classmates and write ...

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I recently made a virtual presentation to a group, and after I was done presenting, we had a discussion about interpersonal relationships. During our conversation, many people expressed concern about how easily they are being replaced. They felt like there was no value given to them and/or a ...

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This week I turn 57 years old. 57 YEARS OLD! Like most other 50-something-year-old individuals, I’m not sure how this happened – it feels like a blink of an eye. One day I’m a college girl, the next a young mother, and now more than one half a century old. How can I be over 50? Most days I feel, ...

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Memorial Day weekend, for many, signifies the unofficial start to summer. Last weekend as I was sitting in my backyard looking at my swimming pool, I began to think about how I felt two years ago when I was able to make a dream a reality. Two years ago, friends and family had to listen to me ...

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Do you ever feel like there is no end to the problems that you face? Do your challenges seem too great to overcome? Do you ever ask yourself, “What’s the point?” Do you allow your circumstances to govern your life to the point of making you sad, lonely, and depressed? If you answered “yes” to ...

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A few months ago I was having dinner with a group of women when one of the ladies remarked, “My ex-husband’s new girlfriend is a demanding bitch and he’s jumping through hoops for her.” I joined in with the group’s resounding “halleluja … amen sister!,” but when the evening ended and after I ...

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This morning I was perusing a toy catalog, shopping for a gift for a friend’s child, when I stumbled upon an item that brought hours of enjoyment to my children. It’s a square box that has different shapes cut out into each side with accompanying matching pieces. The goal of the toy is for children ...

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The number of people working from home, coupled with technology that offers immediate communication, is creating a dangerous work environment in which people are expected to be available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. These expectations can wreak havoc on a person’s physical and emotional ...

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Do you allow fear to stop you dead in your tracks whenever you think about trying something new? Does that voice in your head conjure up a list of reasons to be inactive, why you shouldn’t try to accomplish a goal? For most of my life, I was that person, too afraid to take a chance, ...

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I recently made a presentation in which I talked about the importance of eliminating negative voices – our own and those from external sources. I explained there are many people, for whatever reason, consciously or unconsciously, who will say things that can have a detrimental impact one’s ...

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With the coronavirus outbreak, social distancing restrictions have been put in place. But social distancing does not have to mean socially disconnecting. Before coronavirus concerns, one in four older adults were affected by social isolation. Now, with limits on public gatherings and guidance on ...

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Every day we are bombarded with information about the coronavirus outbreak. Doctors and other healthcare providers share tips to help us stay healthy, and we are even taught the proper way to wash our hands. While personal health and hygiene are of the utmost importance, perhaps equally important ...

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There are very real challenges facing our world today. A pandemic, financial concerns, isolation, and health issues can create anxiety and fear. When the news is all doom and gloom, it’s hard for even the most optimistic among us to stay positive, but that is exactly what we must do! Just at a ...

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This morning, I received a phone call from a business colleague with whom I have forged a friendship. During the call, she informed me about her recent illness and shared the challenges that she endured. After hearing about her suffering and subsequent recovery, I said, “Oh honey, I’m so happy that ...

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Recently, I was in conversation with a group of people and during that time I shared some exciting professional news. After hearing what I said, one woman rolled her eyes and remarked sarcastically, “You are so lucky … everything always happens for you and is so easy!” I looked at this person, ...

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One of the questions that I am often asked is how to permanently end a relationship with someone that is a negative force in a person’s life. I have heard many terms to describe these types of people, but one of my favorites is energy vampire, because they zap the life out of you. A relationship ...

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When I was a young girl, like many other girls, I dreamed about what my life would be like. College … career … marriage … children … a house … a dog … and a big, loving family surrounding me. That was my dream. While some of it came true, many of my expectations were shattered, and my life didn’t ...

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